9:36AM
"Encounter with God" John 6:1-15

"Show me, Lord, how your provision reaches into every area of life."  God, you have sent people to me to comfort and encourage me; to lift me up - Mom, Dad, ETC, WD, TB, ABP, and now maybe SF.  You are providing for me the social and emotional aspects of my life through them.  My other basic provisions, food, clothes, shelter - are also covered.  What more do I need God?
      Be with me now, Lord, as I once again study your Word after a month hiatus of laziness.  Help me to remain true to your course.  Build in me a fire of passion for you like SF has.  I want to be as excited for you as she seems to be - looking to you, and not the legalism of rules and theology or doctrine; no, et me focus on you!
      Bless those who have been here for me.  Bless my parents - give them continued health and wisdom, help me to be patient with them.  Bless ETC in his quiet ways, speak to him in a way that will draw him to you.  Give him peace of mind, and peace of heart - he must still really miss MO.  Bless WD; fill her with your love so that she doesn't feel empty or that something is missing; be with her and send into her life those who will genuinely love her.  Lift her up.  Bless TB in his studies and relationship with E.  Fill him with your love and call to him in no uncertain voice to follow you.  Mould him into the man you want him to be.  Bless and be with SC and HIS EBC; help them when they are over-worked to take time out to look at you and praise you for all that you've done in their lives.  Remove the stress from their sometimes hectic schedules.  Bless ABP; thank you for her love and caring.  Provide for her the friendships and relationships she needs to feel fulfilled.  Be with BP too.  Hold them in your arms.  God, I ask you to shine into AD's life.  Blow away any darkness which clings to her, and open her to your loving spirit.  Bless LP in the new life she has made apart from me and my influences.  Love her and be with her family in their trials and tribulations.  Bless Apau; grow in her, and be her constant companion.  Open her mind to new understanding of you.  Be with all my aunts, uncles, and cousins.  Be with JF and MF.  Enliven them  and put the glory of your name on their tongues.  Be with PP and his family, show them your unconditional love and move in their lives to serve you and follow you closely.
       I love you God, you are amazing in the way you work in my life.  Continue to dwell in me and to show me your grace and kindness.  Through Jesus Christ, my LORD, who lives and reigns with you, Eternal God, and the Holy Spirit, now and forever, Amen.

"It is clear that normal human experience of what is realistic often have to be revised when God is at work.  How many times have Christians said 'Eight Months' wages wouldn't be enough to see us through this Crisis!' only to find that  a miracle happens?  God changes the circumstances or touches the hearts of people so they give, and the crisis evaporates."

"If we just 'spiritualize' [Jesus'] teachings we can get him wrong also elimination political and social relevance from who he is.  To call Jesus the 'Christs' (Messiah) is to recognize that his Word reaches all of life, and we must learn from him about power, rule, justice and authority."

The Inner Voice of Reason by Henri J. Nouwen p. 28
"You have been speaking a lot about dying to old attachments in order to enter the new place, where God is waiting for you.  But it is impossible to end up with too many noes - no to your former way of thinking and feeling, no to things you did in the past and most of all, no to human relationships that were once precious and life giving.  You are setting up a spiritual battle full of noes, and you work yourself ot despair when you realize how hard it seems if not impossible to cut yourself off from the past.
       "The love that came to you in particular, concrete human friendships and that awakened your dormant desire to be completely and unconditionally loved was real and authentic.  It does not have to be denied dangerous and idolatrous.  A love that comes to you through human beings is true, God-given love and needs to be celebrated as such.  When human relationships prove to be unliveable because you demand that your friends love you in ways that are beyond human capacity, you do not have to deny the reality of the love you received.  When you try to die to that love in order to find God's love, you are doing something God does not want.  The task is not to die to life-giving relationships but to realize that the love you received in them is part of a greater love.
      "God has given you a beautiful self.  There God dwells and loves you with the first love, which precedes all human love.  You carry all your own beautiful, deeply loved self in your heart.  You can and must hold on to the truth of that love you were given and recognize that same love in others who see your goodness and love you.
      "So stop trying to die to the particular real love you have received.  Be grateful for it and see it as what enabled you to open yourself to God's fierst love."

I had tea yesterday with a young woman, SF, who is more on fire and excited by Jesus than anyone I have ever seen.  She talks softly so I didn't catch all that she was saying, but at the time it seemed like a radical new approach to faith and knowing God.  I should have written about it yesterday because it's slipping my mind what exactly she said.  She said legalism is bad, and that we need to focus on Jesus and he will provide us with the faith we need to follow him; it is not our doing, but only his.  She seemed so empassioned by it that I didn't want to interupt her to clarify what she was saying for me.  But it was a wonderful time with her.